Do parents have to choose between academic 'excellence' and the wellbeing of children?
How holistic education can bridge the gap between academic success, wellbeing and inclusion.
This past week, the ThriveNow team engaged in thoughtful discussions with parents and progressive education leaders about the transition from holistic, child-centred primary education to mainstream secondary schools.
For decades, alternative and progressive schools have prioritised emotional wellbeing alongside academic growth, creating nurturing environments that support the whole child. Yet, as children approach secondary school, many parents wonder: how well does this approach align with an exam-driven system? The transition can be especially challenging for young people with SEND, those who thrive in flexible learning settings, or those who struggle with rigid, test-focused education.
The growing pressure to be ‘secondary-ready’: the elephant in the room.
A key concern raised was ‘academic preparedness’, particularly in a system where success is measured through exams. Many alternative provision (AP) and progressive mainstream primaries reject standardised SATs in favour of broader learning. But as secondary school approaches, some parents worry whether additional tutoring is needed to ‘bridge the gap’, especially as GCSE preparation begins almost immediately.
This is not just an issue for AP families. Increasingly, mainstream parents are also turning to tutoring to ensure their children are ‘secondary-ready’, raising serious concerns about inclusion. If private tutoring is becoming a necessity for success, what happens to families who can’t afford it? A system that requires financial privilege to access the support children need is, by definition, inequitable.
Beyond exam-driven learning: how holistic education benefits society
Mainstream education often prioritises test results over broader life skills, yet research suggests a more holistic, inclusive approach leads to stronger societies. In addition to the wealth of research available through Rethinking Assessment, here’s why:
1) Stronger social cohesion
Values-led learning fosters inclusion and reduces division. UNESCO research shows that diverse, community-focused education strengthens social responsibility.
2) Economic growth & employability
Education focused on developing knowledge, skills and values improves career prospects. The OECD’s research around education and skills shows that hands-on, values-driven education leads to better long-term employment.
3) Better mental health & wellbeing
A holistic approach improves student wellbeing. This UNESCO report found that inclusive learning environments boost self-worth, resilience, and engagement.
4) Ethical & environmental awareness
Schools that integrate sustainability and ethical education see long-term societal benefits. Department for Education's Sustainability and Climate Change Strategy aligns with global frameworks such as UNSDGs and underscores the critical role of education in achieving long-term climate objectives.
The evidence is clear: a broader approach to education—one that values skills, ethics, and real-world learning—creates stronger societies.
The cost of an alternative
One example of an alternative provision that focuses on child-centred, holistic learning is Educare Small School. Schools like Educare offer an approach that prioritises personal development alongside academic learning, with practices such as:
Emotional regulation and self-management – helping children develop lifelong skills to manage emotions and stress.
The ‘ready list’ – a practical tool that children internalise and even encourage their parents to use.
Alexander technique – supporting bodily awareness and mindfulness in daily practice.
Movement circle – aiding physical development and nervous system regulation.
A whole-child approach – integrating well-being practices seamlessly into the school day.
A nurturing community – where students feel truly seen and valued.
Arts integration – fostering creativity through music, art, and dance.
Deep learning – prioritising understanding over rote memorisation.
Outdoor education and forest school – facilitating a safe space in nature to build relationship with self and natural world.
The cost of attending Educare is similar to the UK government’s average per-pupil spending of £8,210 per year—yet despite not being a ‘SEND’ school its holistic approach fosters greater SEND inclusion, benefiting a diverse range of learners.
In contrast, the state can spend up to £40,000 per year on SEND students who cannot access the rigidity of mainstream education. This raises a crucial question: why is government money funding a system that entrenches inequality instead of exploring investing in proven alternatives that offer greater social and economic benefits?
Looking beyond exams
Throughout this discussion, a key concern has emerged: the challenge of balancing a nurturing, child-centred education with the academic demands of mainstream schooling. Following are some ideas on how to ‘bridge the gap’ without having to employ tutors:
Small shifts—such as focusing on intrinsic motivation rather than grades, integrating creative and outdoor learning, and fostering self-reflection—can make a significant difference. Encouraging curiosity beyond the curriculum, celebrating effort over outcomes, and creating space for play and exploration all help build confidence and resilience. Both the LEGO Foundation and Play Scotland have published valuable research and practical strategies that could be useful.
For children who struggle at school, stories of others who have followed their passions despite academic challenges can be incredibly powerful. Dame Gillian Lynne who Sir Ken Robinson talks about in his famous TED talk, Karren Brady, Lorraine Pascale, Cherie Blair, Ben Fogle, Jamie Oliver, and Joe Wicks all struggled within the school system and yet went on to build thriving careers by embracing their strengths. Their journeys remind us that success isn’t defined by test scores—it’s about finding what lights you up and having the courage to pursue it.
The education system may take time to change, but we can start today by helping our children see their worth beyond grades.
The bigger picture: reimagining secondary education
So, do parents have to choose between academic excellence and their children’s wellbeing?
We believe the answer is no—true education nurtures both.
At ThriveNow, we are building a secondary school that proves this is possible. Launching in September 2026, ThriveNow Secondary will combine a holistic, child-centred approach with the academic rigour needed for future success. Beyond our own school, we are open-sourcing its framework and resources and reaching deep into our community to help address the systemic inequalities discussed earlier.
We believe in an education that values the whole child—their emotional, social, physical, and academic growth—without compromising on depth or ambition. ThriveNow Secondary aims to continue the foundation set by schools like Educare, ensuring students are not just prepared for exams, but for life.
Join the conversation
If you share our vision for a more inclusive, holistic education system, we’d love to hear from you. We're gathering insights to help shape ThriveNow Secondary and advocate for change in mainstream schooling. Your experiences—whether as a parent, educator, or supporter of educational reform—can help build a system that nurtures both academic success and wellbeing, ensuring all children have the opportunity to thrive.
We're currently running two pilot questionnaires and invite you to have your say:
one for parents of primary-age children (and home educators seeking school alternatives) and
These are part of a wider series gathering insights from key education stakeholders, including parents, young people, teachers, and school leaders.
We believe the future of education lies in bridging the gap between holistic development and academic preparation—creating spaces where children can thrive emotionally while developing the knowledge and skills they need for their futures.
We invite you to be part of this journey, whether by sharing your experiences, participating in our questionnaires, or simply continuing these important conversations in your own communities.
With gratitude,
Kimberley and Arunjay.
Kimberley and Arunjay are co-founders of ThriveNow, developing ThriveNow Secondary School for September 2026.